Pretentious stuffs

1. A good friend commented to me that my writings in the church devotionals book sound “pretentious” at times. The more I think about it, the more I agree with him about the comment, although I guess it more aptly describes who I am. I like to be seen as an expert. Indeed, I want people to have an impression that I am smart or elegant. I think that is perhaps one of the reasons I read supposedly chiem books. But in the end I guess I am building on quicksand and it will be crumbling sooner or later.

(Post paper-rejection syndrome.)

2. My friend wrote a column in The Jakarta Post! He was the valedictorian of my high school batch, by the way.

3. A saying of Confucius in Outram Park MRT inspires me, “It does not matter how slowly you go so long as you do not stop.” Surely I could not get slower than I have been for my study. And I really wish that someone comes up with the doctrine of perseverance of the scholars. (Does anybody know the exact source?)

4. “I am the old man and I am also the new man. . . I in my apparently unrepeatable selfhood apprehend, or do not apprehend, am called or not called, am elected or rejected: I am judged, I am blessed.” (I/2, 266) I am blessed through judgments. I am judged through blessings.

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