Now I really think that my attempts to look humble are actually exposing my love of being praised. Humility is elusive.
And I seriously need to get out of my escapist attitude with regards to conflict. I lack confidence to argue with others. I need to remind myself that it is fine to have a different opinion, especially about matters which are very important for you. Hauerwas observed that truthfulness is sorely lacking in our contemporary speech. And I guess I am an example of such absence of truthfulness, as my default attitude is to concede defeat so that I could please others.